Catch Up

I feel as though I have been in zombie mode for the last year and a half.  This last surrogacy was an amazing ride but it really took a lot out of me.  I planned on blogging about the last few weeks of the pregnancy and adding pics along the way but never got around to it so tonight I'm playing catch-up! 

At 32 weeks Helena met us at the airport and flew home with the kids and I.  It was so fun being there with her and getting to know her better! I cherished every moment.  Though there were rough times missing Joe and being away from home, Helena took good care of us and helped me with the kiddos a ton.  It was nice being taken care of especially with carrying such precious cargo.  Over the next few weeks Helena and I had 2 ultrasounds and 1 none-stress test.  Everything looked perfect.  My only worry was that Amira (baby B) was stubbornly staying breach despite all my frantic baby spinning efforts.  Our Dr. agreed to perform a version (manual turning of the baby) after Zaki was born but if that failed, I would have to receive a section!! I was of course worried but decided that there was no point in stressing about it so I just tried to think happy thoughts and imagine myself having the perfect birth. Joe flew out and spent two long weekends with us before the birth rolled around.  The time we had there in SF as a family was precious   While we were apart we appreciated each other more which I am so grateful for now!

35 weeks

Here is the full long gory story of the twins birth... feel free to take a potty break and pop some popcorn. Its a doozy! On October 30th Helena took me to get a Massage at the four seasons!.  It had been a very generous gift for me from her sister sister in law! At that point I was 36.3 days pregnant. I went in for the massage and my masseuse explained that part of the time I would be on my side and part on my back. I figured this person should know that a pregnant women should not be on her back for more than 5 minutes at a time. Well the massage started and I was so distracted that it took me a while to realize that I had been on my back for a really long time and my lower belly was really sore.  I was getting ready to say something when he had me roll over on my side.  But I was only there for a about 15 minutes when he put me back on my back .  By the time the massage was over, my belly was really sore. The contractions started as soon as I got in the car to go home.   At first i thought they were just braxtons but then realized after about an hour that they were rhythmic and not stopping   I told Helena that I was going to lay down because I was having contractions.  That actually made them stronger so Helena made arrangements for a friend to come watch my kids while I gathered things for my hospital bag.  It was around my kiddos bed time so I helped put them to bed and we made our way to the hospital at 9pm.  

3 hours before delivery!

Just as we were leaving my contractions really started to pick up.  I reclined in the car and was moaning and breathing through the contractions.  Each turn and stop was painful.  When we got to the hospital I was starting to enter "labor land" (kneeling down and rocking on all fours during contractions) so I was really annoyed when they wanted to hook me up and monitor the babies for 30 minutes! I was ready to find a comfortable position and concentrate on giving birth!  I insisted on laying on my side as much as possible during the monitoring which helped get me through the contractions.  The monitor was distracting so labor slowed down a bit. The Dr. on call Came in and talked me into getting the epidural. She told me she would not deliver the second baby breech so I would need a section if the version didn't work. At this point she checked me and I was 5 centimeters dilated. Finally everyone left and labor really took off!!!  I was  having to do deep breathing and focus during the hugs and though I wasn't timing them they felt back to back. Helena was noticing too but the nurse (who was still coming in and asking random questions) was completely oblivious.
Around 10:30ish (i'm guessing on time) they asked me if I wanted to walk or ride a wheel chair up to the OR floor. At that point I had just started to notice that I was becoming queezy and shaky, a sure sign that I was entering transition. I told her I couldn't get up So they calmly wheeled my bed up to a prep room on the OR floor and got ready to put an IV in. When we got to the room I had two contractions and knew I was definitely in transition.  The nurse trying to put the IV in kept telling me to make a fist but I had suddenly become so weak I could barely squeeze my hand! On her first try she blew a vein which normally would probably hurt but at that point I was getting ready to push a baby out so I barely noticed. Another more experienced nurse came over and got the IV in. During this I was now yelling and growling through my contractions! At one point I remember blurting out in between contractions "if you want me to have the epidural it needs to happen now" Things were moving really really fast!  Then I felt something oozing, I said I think I'm leaking something so someone took a peek and there was a lot of bloody show. Then another contraction came and it sounded like I was pushing through it as I growled my way through it. I heard someone in the hall say "what was that" and my nurse responds.. my patient, we need a Dr. In here NOW! The next few minutes were sort of a blur. my bed was suddenly flying down the hallway with a flurry of people running with us shouting orders.

We get into the OR and I'm still laying on my side. They tell me to climb onto the operating table and I shout NO!  One nurse keeps saying... 'You need to cooperate'! (I still suspicion that women has never given birth) I wanted to be a good patient but the pain and intense pressure I was feeling was almost unbearable! I was giving birth for goodness sakes, and not floating in water like I would have preferred! I was laying on an uncomfortable stiff bed in a bright room with people yelling at me! I literally could not move! All the blood was leaving my arms and legs making them tingle. I couldn't move my fingers at all and my hands were all curled up. This happens to me when the baby is traveling down the birth canal for some strange reason. Finally they could tell I wasn't going to move so they moved the blanket I was on to get me over. Ouch!!

Helena told me later that one of the nurses asked her to tell me to cooperate!! Lol. Once I was on the table they told me to roll onto my back and put my feet in the stirrups. I yelled back, Just hold my leg up! The baby was coming and I could not move! Then I felt his head crowning and I pushed as hard as I could. The Dr. grabbed my legs, turning me on my back and put my feet in the stirrups, super OUCH!! Then I pushed baby boys head out. I was ready to get him all out in one push but they told me to stop because his cord was too tight. I waited as long as I could but when the next contraction came I HAD to push and she must have loosened it because the rest of his body came shooting out. I gasped in relief!!! WOW! Helena was right there next to my head and she leaned over and kissed me a few times on the forehead. It was such a relief to temporarily have the pain gone that it shocked me when my Dr. Shoved her hand up there not so gently. Without even thinking I took my foot and kicked her hand out. And yelled..Ouch! Get out of there!! I mean come on! NO warning or nothing?!? I don't think she's used to a drug free labor

So my Dr. Explains that she needs to be in there while they turn the second baby. I'm still at a loss as to why she would need her arm (almost up to her armpit)  up there.  They grab the ultrasound machine and start trying to figure out where baby girl is. She was laying transverse head on my left and butt to the right. I was yelling in pain with the two nurses punching my belly and the Dr. With her arm up there. I knew they would section me if they couldn't turn baby girl so I tried my hardest to just lie as limp as possible. I asked a few times about baby boy and Helena assured me he was fine. I was surprised she was still there supporting me and told her to go check on her baby. She asked me if I was sure and I said yes! Go!  She had waited so long for these babies and yet there she was comforting me. I get teary eyed thinking about it.  She was only gone for a minute then came back with baby boy. She took a picture of him and I... I'm so out of it I'm cross eyed! haha

As they were rubbing the ultrasound wand around I realized my bladder was so full it was painful. Just then a nurse pushed on the top of my uterus down with a fist. OUCH!! I tried peeing but couldn't so I said.. please just catheter me! The dr. said yeah! that would give baby's head more room to come down (Duh:) Helena told me later that she was horrified at what they were doing to my belly! She wanted to tell them to be careful because her baby was still in ther! Finally, after about 10 minutes of manipulating my belly, I heard some one say "She's head down"! Yes!!!! The Dr said.. "Ok, now lets break her water so baby doesn't float back up". She reached up there and tried breaking the water. That really hurt! I said... Ouch, use the crochet hook! It took her a minute of rooting around in there and finally there was a huge explosion of water. with a huge gush my uterus gave an enormous lurch. Helena grabbed my hand and I squeezed as hard as I could because my body was pushing baby girls head out.  It was so fast and intense! (Partly because a nurse was still pushing down on the top of my belly with all her might so baby girl wouldn't float back up) Her little head popped out followed very closely by her body. Ah! Sweet relief! The Dr. Investigated and told me that I had one little tear not even big enough to stitch. YAY! Just when I thought the pain was over my Doc reached in there again!  I said ouch what are you doing?! She told me that she needed to get the placentas out. What?!? I said.. I can push them out. Then she reached in and scooped them out one at a time. Maybe she forgot I didn't have the epidural ouch! Unwilling to even let me deliver my own placentas! sheesh.   

Helena was still there with me. I asked her about baby girl and she assured me everything was fine. I was on cloud nine!  Laying there shivering, half naked, half covered in blood and amniotic fluid all I could think was I DID IT!!  I couldn't believe how fast everything went and the stars aligned in such a way that I didn't need a c-section! Both babies were beautiful and doing amazing! The birth wasn't ideal but I got the natural (or rather drug free) birth that I had been praying for!!! Woohoo! I learned in the recovery room that baby boy weighed 5.9 and girly was  just under 5 pounds.  They were born 12 minutes apart. 

baby girl

Helena's late husbands parents flew in the night after we went home. His mother came in and thanked me and we just stood there crying and holding each other. I don't know what it's like to lose a son but I have seen how much my parents have suffered loosing my brother. These babies must be such a miracle to them. I am so honored to have been a part of that!! Helen, who I have grown very close to over the last four weeks was now a mommy!!! It was just me and her for the birth and she was the best support I could have asked for!  It was so amazing being there with her and experiencing everything with her. I was given the chance to stay and nurse the babies.  That was a new adventure all in its own.  I loved seeing them everyday and spending time with them, watching them grow.  They would nurse every two hours like clock work so I was exhausted to say the least but I wouldn't have traded it for the world! After two weeks I felt pretty much back to normal! Joe and I could put the kids to bed and go for walks in down town SanFran.  We had so much fun! I was there nursing 6 weeks so a total of 10 weeks away from home.  We flew home just in time for Christmas. I continued to pump for the twins for  two months. I am so thankful that I was able to produce enough for them. 

I still can't believe its all over! would I do it again... absolutely! What an amazing adventure and an experience I will forever cherish.  I thank my lucky stars that Helena found me and trusted me enough to give life to her embryos! What an honor! I will never forget Helena and her precious babies or how her and her family have touched our lives forever!  

True love

What is going on in this picture you ask? Shyloh is in love with her stuffed animals.  She coos at them, she pets them, she carries about 5 in her arms at all times.  The funniest and most entertaining thing she does however is bites their noses.  I'm not quite sure where she learned this.  Her way of showing her fuzzy friends that she loves them is by clamping down on their noses and growling.  You can instantly tell which animals are her favorites because their noses are usually wet, deformed, dirty, moldy or all of the above.  She especially does this first thing in the morning (note the disheveled hair) after a long night of being without her favorite toys.  We just accepted this as part of Shyloh's fun little personality.  Its her sign of affection although I have to admit I am relieved she hasn't tried to do this to me.  I don't think my nose could handle it! So if we come to visit HIDE any stuffed animals you don't want commandeered by our little two year old.  Their noses may not be in the same condition she found them in.

Rest in peace van

Last Thursday I kissed Nolan goodbye and left him at school. My thrift store shopping was coming up empty on 2 year old water shoes so I decided to go to target. While I was waiting patiently to turn left a few cars back from the intersection a women veered into the side of my van. She then proceeded into oncoming traffic and hit another car but because she hit me first the other car had minimal damage.  No one was seriously hurt thank goodness, aside from my poor van.  She was under the influence of medications and admitted to police that she should not have been on the road.  Apparently her reckless paroozing through town already had the police after her so they got there pretty quick.  She had already almost ran down a construction worker so I'm just thankful that I was the one to stop her and not someone else! She was only a block away from the elementary school! Scary!

Unfortunately the van was totaled out.  The whole situation would not have been so bad if we hadn't just dumped so much money into fixing the transmission two months ago.  They gave us a fair value for the van so we will be car/van/hatchback shopping next week.  Not sure what we'll get on our budget.  We may not have enough for another nice van. But I'm fine with a roomy car or a hatchback..  Thank you everyone for your thoughts and prayers :) I will let you know what we find!

Our new pets

The kids and I had a really nice visit down in Tucson.  Their was one day when it was cloudy and sprinkling and Shyloh was sleeping so we decided to go for a little walk.  While we were out Nolan found a millepede! We took it back to the house and found a container for it.  I googled millepedes and found that it was a male and that they were completely harmless.  Nolan was so proud of his discovery that I decided to keep it.  Then decided that we couldn't just have one so we set out the next day to try and find another (hopefully a girlfriend).  Bekah was sweet to come help me but we had no luck so on our way out of town I stopped at Kens Bug Shoppe and we picked up three more Millepedes.  They make really great pets because you just feed them whatever fruit or veggies you have in your fridge! Our millepedes LOVE watermelon.  Nolan always wants to hold them although they are pretty smelly and poop a LOT so I make him wash his hands and disinfect every time.  Welcome to the family Millepedes :)

We have a kindergartener!

Our eldest son Nolan started Kindergarten this year. He is doing very well! The first week was a little rough.  He didn't want me to leave him at first.  Now though, I just walk him to the gate and he goes by himself to class!  His teacher tells me he is good on most days but every now and then he likes making noises like he's blowing something up and has trouble fallowing directions but he is a little boy so I think he is doing really well all things considered!  We have little rewards at home to motivate him to mind his teacher and do his homework. All in all I am really happy with him.  He seams to be ahead of the curriculum already and I am continuing to do some work at home with him as well.  We leave to live with Helena in 6 weeks (October 3rd) and his teacher recommended I just do work with him at home during his absence from school. We will be there with her until I birth these two beans. 

 I was just looking through Nolans baby and toddler pictures the other day and I cannot believe how much he has grown!  Nolan is a sweet boy with a big heart but he knows how to push my buttons at times!  His favorite activity of late is pestering his sister which mainly consists of taking which ever toy she is in possession of at the time. Her retaliatory screams may have caused me permanent hearing damage.  I guess he's just giving her a tougher skin which isn't so bad in this day and age. Were working with him to be a bit nicer to his sister and it seams that he is indeed being a bit sweeter and helps her with different things.  Currently his favorite color is blue and he is really into My Little Pony for some reason. I'm sure I can black male him with that one later ;)  It works though because Shyloh likes it too.  He also has a great memory and a good imagination.  He likes to rein-act t.v shows or movies that he has seen recently and its amazing to me how well he remembers things.  There are times where he will repeat word for word a few lines in a movie after only seeing it once! I am so grateful so far to see that he has has inherited his daddies brains and not mine!

Surro Belly

I seam to be growing at an astronomical rate! Here are the last few weeks of belly pics....

18 weeks

20 weeks

 

22 weeks

25 weeks

Pancake Man

 

I have the BEST husband EVER! What more could a women ask for in a man?  He gets up early ever Saturday morning to retrieve our bountiful basket then makes us the most amazing pancakes I have ever had.  They are to die for and he takes great pride in these scrumptious wheat delicacies.  He uses several different grains and is always tweaking his recipe.  He is truly the pancake master! (recipe below)

Granny Smith’s Whole Wheat Pancakes (Joe Hartzell Version)

      1 cup of soft white wheat kernels (or any wheat really, we just like soft white ;)

           ½ cup of spelt

           ¼ cup of millet

           ¼ cup of golden flax seed meal

           2 ½ cups of milk

 Blend together until creamy, app. 1 minute (if your blender isn’t powerful enough, you may need to grind your wheat first)

          Mix together the following ingredients prior to blending wheat and milk

          2/3 cup extra virgin raw olive oil

          2 Tbsp of raw local honey

          4 eggs

          1 banana

          6-8 strawberries or any other fruit as desired

          1 tsp vanilla

Blend together for app. 30 seconds with wheat and milk mixture. Pour mixture into large bowl and add 2 Tbps of Baking Powder and mix with wire whisk until powder is well mixed

          Now cook on a flat surface, add flax seed on top and cinnamon for additional flavors, we love putting chocolate chips in as it cooks

Ice Cream Cone

This is Shyloh's first ice cream cone! We have tried our bestest to keep her away from ice cream but Grandpas are entitled to spoil their grand kids!  Dad Nielsen had dropped me off to get some blood work done and said he would keep the kiddies busy.  He picked me up and this is what I found.  He said she knew exactly what to do with that cone! She took it and dug right in! She finished hers in half the time Nolan did and Nolan couldn't even finish his.  It was the cutest thing ever watching her gobble up that ice cream! She is just so cute.

Surrogacy update:

We had our first ultrasound this morning and they found two happy healthy little beans in there.  Both hearts were beating away and they both looked very content measuring perfectly!  It is very common for one of the twins to not make it so we have our fingers crossed.  Helena is SO excited! Due date November 24th

On another note, we are moved into our rental home.  Its a cute little town home.  We wanted a house with a yard but for the price its perfect for now. Were in a cute little community with lots of kids Nolan and Shylohs age.  It will be fun!  There is also a community pool but its not working at the moment. The kids and I will probably get a membership at the YMCA this summer.  Now that we are settled I hope to start blogging again.  The kids are so cute and growing so fast! With how crazy life has been I feel like I haven't been documenting properly so hoping to get better about that!

Surrogacy update

We are deffinately pregnant!!
First beta HCG level 540!! 16dpo
Second 1420!!18dpo
Those numbers are awesome!! Instead of just doubling after two days they almost trippled! There migh possibly be two buns in this oven. You can never tell for sure with beta numbers so our ultrasound is on April 6th! We for sure have at least one healthy little bean growing in there so very thankful for that!! H is overjoyed!! She can't wait to be a mother! More updates to come....